These are the things that no one has probably thought to tell you about preparing for a Bar or Bat Mitzvah in the Reform movement. You’ll be glad to know them. Believe me.
- Your child is going to freak out. It’s possible he/she will swear it’s too hard, too complicated, not worth it… Your child will not be the last child to do this. He/She is certainly not the first. I know this as a fact. Stay calm, listen, and cuddle as needed.
- As much as you may cringe when it’s time to go up on the Bema, it is considered an honor to have a role in a child’s B’nai Mitzvah. Don’t hesitate to ask the people who have been important in your child’s life.
- Yes. Invite the entire Hebrew School class to the service and celebration. These kids have been studying with your kid for years. Now is not the time to leave one of them out.
- If the Bar or Bat Mitzah is a shared celebration with your child’s close friend and the temple office tells you not to worry, it will be fine, do not listen. It will not be fine unless the other parents agree that a shared celebration in the temple social hall will be a terrific way to go. If they are not up for that, get a different date for your child. Preferably with a child from a different school!
- Don’t blink. This is your first peek at your child as the adult they are to become. Don’t miss a moment of it. And bring tissues. Lots and lots of tissues.